"Got A Chick Named Superhead, She Give The Super Head"

Author Karrine 'Superhead' Steffans promoted her latest book,"The Vixen Manual", on the CW's news show. Steffans definitely gets a lot of slack for her past and what she has done to get where she is. These news reporters were completely wrong for trying to belittle her on national television, I'm glad she was able to strike back!

I honestly don't feel any disgust towards what she has done. Steffans has simply used what she has to get what she wanted and definitely paid a price for it-she will forever be Superhead. I did read her first book and really felt why she did the things she did. She was raped, abused, abandoned, hated, and was left with nothing. Here she is a beautiful and sexy girl who enjoys sex and the story begins. Let me just say one thing though, there are plenty of people out there who just have casual sex and get nothing out of it! She got paid and I mean PAID. Many would say she was just basically a hooker but I don't see it that way. She said "hey, I love sex so why not benefit from it besides getting a nut?"

At the end of the day she didn't do it for the money, she did it to find love. Many of you can relate on doing a lot of crazy things to find love. We sometimes go through hell and back in life just trying to find that special someone. We put up and settle for the unimaginable. Love is a bitch but yet we need it like the air we breathe.

I once said my first tattoo was going to be "Love Conquers All". I changed my mind.
I realized that it's not love that conquers, it's life that prevails. Life is the foundation to everything not love. Some of you may have different opinions but how can you deny the obvious truth? The beauty that life brings and the things that we do love carry life within them. Life and love are right next to each other, they both have their ups and downs, pains and pleasures, and pros and cons. I've seen cases where love failed and people even tried to commit suicide over a heartbreak but at the end of the day, when everything is over, people realize that they are still breathing. People also realize that after all they are still alive and sometimes we need different genres to confirm that we indeed are still living. I believe that love comes in when we need to learn lessons, to help us out for a certain point in our life, to let us know that there are things pure as white doves yet filthy and tainted like the devil's hands. There is less and less love everyday we live. Love is fading while life is forever. Something shall always be living. Without life we wouldn't have love and sometimes we get the definitions confused but you already know what prevails at the end. At some point in our lives we have a notion that the relationship we are in will last forver because it works so well, I don't mean to be a downer but nothing lasts forever but time and life. People, stop trying to find love! It will eventually come to you!Even worst stop trying to deny to yourself that what you have is true love. Live life and enjoy everything you've always wanted to do rather than worrying about what you keep doing wrong and why!
I've always said "If we keep wondering why then we will never know how".


I want to hear from my readers:

Does love conquer all or does life conquer all?
What is your position on what I've stated?
What experiences can you relate to what I've said?

J.Z.Z.

The wind has blown

The seasons have gotten stronger and changed quicker

There is no denying that passion still lingers through the cracks of broken trust

A once best friend has transformed into a tourist in Eutopia

Though my tongue I shall bite to prevent breaking your made-up image

I will never forgive the reasons you chose to turn your nose up

Love changed you but I made you

I handed you swag and a pair of pumps in a duffle bag

I granted you abstract while you rocked Baby Phat

The brightest star has faded within you

You no longer hold the same place in my heart

Replaced you shall not be but let go you will be

I keep the positive energy within me

I'm glad that I was able to change someone's life for a greater purpose than intended

Love, oh love

How you swept the closest being right from under my nose

I pray that there will never be a stormy night when I recieve a phone call from a familiar number asking for guidance

Voicemail has plenty of options for you

From my hands I let you go into the galaxy

My blessing I give

Just hoping you don't end up needing GPS

The Rising Crystals' love has diminished into dust

Blowing in gravity with new seeds to plant

Keep praying

I love you

I'll Send You A Postcard

There is nothing left in my room
I'm leaving today
Don't want to look back, just erase it all.
Let the new vibes melt within
I didn't say good-bye because there was never a hello
My dreams are coming into reality
Thank you, I live.
I had to endure you to make sure the living was breathing
I fought the fire and stayed the night away
When this dove flew, your ego bled uncontrollably
I'm leaving on a good note
....No note at all
Forget me as I shall you
For the night was just born

100th Post: Untitled.

Whelp, here it is! My 100th post! I know it's traditional to post something meaningful, so I'm posting something very personal . I'm posting the prologue to my upcoming book. I must warn you though, this is a autobiography of a Eutopian. It's not your ordinary autobiography, this book will include ART, a documentary, pictures, and objects. I wanted this book to translate certain emotions through visions like: a thick rusty nail being hammered into a manicured finger, a glowing angel whispering to a baby, and a beautiful woman with continuously growing hair. Mental pictures. Ideas. Love. Art. Sex. Family. Peace. Betrayal. Words alone cannot command your attention to my experiences. I do not expect you to believe, approve, or ask anything.
Just feel.


Prologue:

In an all white painted room filled with framed memories that were unknown to him, he sat next to the ice cold body that was once his lover. What he felt couldn't be translated to his face because there were no emotions to process. All the sweet walks in the park, late night giggling cellular conversations, and those sweaty raunchy fucks didn't phase him. This body represented something he wasn't-Death. Head over heels for it he was just a few hours ago. It became an it. With no who, what, where, how, and why he moved from one death bed to the next. Making this pattern a fun love game that would never be discovered. Cruel intentions? No, just a mind fuck. Ran his fingers on the wallpaper that was once glued against the wall with true love, laughing uncontrollably. " I win! I win! I win!" the chant echoed through the house full of intoxicated friends. Echoes that would never be heard. Pressing tears on his eye lids he began his infamous Academy Award winning act. Yelling "Why!?" crying through the coked-out crowd he ran for help. " I- I -I why?! Me?! I don't know anymore!! I love.." he freaked out. " Call an ambulance" a guy suggested. Kicking walls and biting himself he convinced these friends. a tortured soul was trapped within those four white walls. Falling in love with such a delicate and devoted human being that he dedicated his life to. A true actor. " No one will ever know" his mind repeated. A truth that would cause endless tears for endless lives.

" I miss you baby!" two years later. Running his normal daily routine he cooked the most delicious breakfast that even Paula Deen dreams about. " Your cheesy eggs are almost done Bae! Bring your ass over here now!" he giggled through the wireless phone "I would love those eggs but I'm wrapped up in this meeting, I'm sorry sexy" the voice regretted. The door bell rang and he rushed to the door. " Hold on Bae, let me call you right back, OK?" he playfully asked " Sure sexy, I'll actually call you when I'm done" The agreement was set but the drastic whirlwind that was behind that vague doorbell ring was going to set the tone for the day. "Coming!" as he opened the door wiping the black pepper from his hands onto his apron while he turned the chrome door knob his whisk abruptly hit the wooden floor. It was like he seen a ghost.

I want to thank my fellow followers and supporters for showing my work so much love! As I always say, I truly appreciate your comments and feedback. Keep supporting and I promise you will see nothing but great things from me! once again, thank you so much!

Michael Jackson Memories

1958- 2009

From A Beautiful Mind

Within less than a month my views of everything has almost completely turned. My priorities have shifted, My suborn eyes have open, and I have received a great amount of blessings. There are many intense situations that I have encountered that have changed my perspective of a lot of people in my life. I've gotten closer with some and distanced myself from others. One out of many lessons I have learned: Only a handful of people can handle a real friend. Some are just accustomed to associates and fake friends. People always wonder why others are always more than willing to become close with Beau Averee. They now know why. Everyone has different definitions of what a friend is. Mine is definitely more family-like than associate-like. If I wanted you to be an associate then I would refer to you as so. I thought that the efforts I put into so many friendships would make a difference, they did, but not the difference I would have liked. Instead I got clarity of people's true intentions and colors. Now I'm always a positive person but I was constantly slammed with negative energy. I overcome. I always asked myself "why do I always over look the ones that I really should be close with and tend to go after the ones who I feel there is a story behind?" There is a story behind everyone. I thought and stated that I needed my best friend. That statement is false. I didn't lie, my emotions steered me wrong. I'm not modest enough not to state that I'am a strong human. There are many mistakes I have made but I'm not perfect. Those mistakes that I gladly endured became a shovel to dig out my own path to where I need to be. Where I wanted to be was definitely not where I needed to be.

"We as human sometimes lose touch of reality and tend to build our own world. A world that revolves around us that denies what is in front of us."- Beau Averee

There are so many people that have came into my life to destroy it and deliver negativity. I'm the kind of person who likes to see the good in people. I believe that I can be the one that can get through steel walls and cross over alligator infested moats. At the end I end up swallowing my words. I have done a great amount of things for people but never have I once asked for anything in return but appreciation. I've had so many people that just take, take, take, and take then I explode. People sure take my kindness for weakness but little do they know it doesn't take much for me to forget them. I will remain generous and kind but now I know who to deliver these things to.

As of today, I have no expectations of people, this way there is no way of me becoming disappointed. I'm letting people play the role they intend to play in my life. I'm not forcing, asking, repeating, and definitely not tolerating anything that isn't meant to be. I'm more focused on MY life. I have a lot going for me and I intend on reaching impossible levels with or without anyone. I'm bringing people close to me who inspire, motivate, and push me to be a better person. So far I have a few that have been here with me since the beginning. I'm ready to move mountains with my energy and I shall. There is a long and foggy road infront of me but I have the sun right behind me. I have embraced. I have accepted. I have grown.

"My life is like wine."-Beau Averee

Insane In The Membrane!

Brian M. Viveros

"Broken Hearted Girl" & "Ego" (Remix)

Beyonce realeased her "Iam..." anthology video album today and released Broken Hearted Girl".


Beyonce is definitely giving us some of her acting chops in this video. I love the translation of the mood in black and white and then the transition in color. It's simple but it works! This is one of her most heart felt records on her latest LP.


Find more videos like this on The Celebrity Network

The "Ego" (Remix) video is the same as the original, just Kanye's scene edited in . Blah. I appreciated the choreography but to entertain and satisfy someone like me, you need to go that extra limit. Kanye's verse is the business!

More Beyonce releases later on today.

What do you think of the video?

Keeping It Alive!

PS 22 Choir in NYC's Staten Island has re-created Lady GaGa's "Just Dance" and I must say this shows exactly why we have to keep music alive in our school systems! For many children, music is a way out, a way of deeply expressing veiled emotions, and an activity to definitely look forward to. Without music, there is no life. GaGa would be proud! Enjoy!

Introducing: Olivia Broadfield

The name is Olivia Broadfield, a British songstress whose voice and mellow flow will take your mind on a trip down memory lane in every shape and form! Broadfield shimmers with an electro-pop vibe while delivering a sweet and warm vanilla mood. "Don't cry" I believe is the best way to introduce her mesmerizing symphony.

Sounds like: A scoop of Frou Frou/ A tablespoon of Feist/ A pinch of Regina Spektor

A Timeless Record

I was peppered sprayed until my eyes seen Nirvana

I played the fool by allowing myself to limit and lower my standards

You were the objective

But even though my skills played cautiously, The emotions I bottled up

Quicksand was mistaken for solid ground

Then my mind I could not turn back around

You sly dog, you!

Our friendly flirtation brewed a volcanic eruption

Playing the innocent role you tried to evaporate my being

Taken what matters most to me every time our lips met

Now, I'm going to take you for a walk in the park

To recap your loss

I'm not here to laugh, beg, cry, or even justify

I'm here as light, while you openly play in the dark alleys

I found you through the trail of condoms you left

Giggled to myself as I witnessed your game

But I always win, so there is no game to play

While you haven't mourned your loss yet

I'm building a new life

You're not half the person people see you to be

But you're twice the person I figured you'd be

You see, I reached a new level

While you constantly trip over your dignity and who you're trying to be

I'm always going to be captain of the ship

You just became "man over board!"

Now let me re-introduce myself

With two fingers in the air

Peace!

Aurora Borealis

I see spaceships over the ocean at night
It calms the waters
Revives the temple where I lay my head
The new morning beams awaken the spirits
It is time for brighter beams to nourish my roots

A Kiss Is A Quiet " I Love You "

Hello readers! I'm in the process of making a lot of moves dealing with my career. I haven't really spoken to anyone about what I'm doing but, I'll just say that everything is going to change! It's not going to happen overnight but, I'm just keeping VERY positive and secretive about this...shhhh!... I'm turnin' tables up in this bitch! I'm loving life right now, as I always do! Things are where they should be and I'm truly grateful for everything I have been blessed with. A lot has been on my mind about certain situations that I'm torn about. I have no regrets, ever. I view everything as a lesson and a stepping stone. My life wouldn't be how it is if I dwell on a lot of things that have occurred. Some decisions may hurt but, in the end, I'm happy and that's all that matters, right? right.

My love life...*GASP*... Yes, love life!!, is going AMAZING! It's a great thing when two souls that have an extreme amount to offer come together as one. I never really thought I would be able to have someone that adds on to who I'am. No one completes you but you. I don't depend on anyone for anything! I have learned not to expect anything from anyone. If you can't add to my being then why bother? Gladly, I have a secret place to retreat to. We shall be the ultimate power couple!

Kiss....I kiss you there and I feel it here....I've never wasted a kiss, ever. I never comprehended how people can just be at nightclubs and " make-out". Your body is a temple and if you choose to grant access to someone....make sure they respect and cherish it! A kiss allows two body energies to zap at a touch of lips. It purifies your love zone while booting your Kama Sutra levels. To me sex and kissing is giving up a piece of who you are. Too bad not many people can really indulge in the true meaning of a kiss and the genuine definition of SEX. The secret behind a perfect kiss? you have to mean it.

A kiss is a quiet " I love you".

Photo by: Theodore Urban, Welcome back from Italy!.

Savoring A Human

In this dark corner he wept
Finished and raised up
Looked in the mirror and fixed his hair
Gently placed that smile on his face that brightens everyone's day
He knew his place in your heart
There was nothing he could to
Tried to accept it
He found himself gawking into space
Not empty but full of space
Maybe in another lifetime we could be....or not
He keeps on trying to defeat this
He is at war with these feelings
Feelings that shouldn't be
He catches himself wishing that tingling sensation to dry up
There is no doubt in his mind where you belong
But he can't
His karma is already tainted by speaking of this
He even tried savoring a new flavor but it felt like acid to his taste buds
You carry your poker face so well
This allows him to make the ripping of the vein in his heart that leads to you easy
Stonger he grows
I guess you'll never know how wonderful he really is
He doesn't mind because its not where it is
It's only where he wants to be
Better sooner than later
I guess you'll never know how wonderful he really is
Fuck!, this cigarette isn't lasting long enough
This too shall pass
On a morning sunset it will all diminish
But savoring you he shall not forget
forgive me
It's time to go

Epicenter

You see, down there was no place for me
I admired
Almost tripped down there
But you see, life, life, life
ahhh yes
It adores my aura
I unconsciously end of where I want to go
But, I almost always end up where I need to be
You see, we were fools
But Mama ain't raise no fool
So that character made me itch
I fell too quick
Thank God for quick reflexes
Though this made-up face conceals when my body cries
I had to let you go
Even though our souls could never depart, I know where I stand
Excuse me, but my ego just said, " I'm The top priority"
So if you aren't ready for the real deal, keep that candy pushing
It's delirious down there
And I do my best work on top
You see, these words are my own
No false pretense
My voice echoes down there
The vision is clear
You see, down there is no place for me right now

Sparkling Moon Shards

I held your hand through the storm
and now you're tell me you're leaving me for the norm
Astonished, I thought I was ready for you
I knew I was
Cried until the moon woke me up
Felt so lost even the stars looked lonely
I managed to use my hands but fell on my feet
The softness of your skin
Led the way for my fingertips
A never ending place, That only you and I knew about
My treasure was only yours but, once you get the best you always look for more
In the end you always end up with less
Conscience always told me you would settle for a whore
Even though I gave you all I had and even more
My body shakes and trembles as you caress my hair
And Im only left with an empty stare
In the mirror my questions just multipy
They come right back without a answer but, with plenty of vanity
You're so weird
Never thought about you again
I guess you weren't true
But I never thought I wasted my time
You helped me across the pond
Thank you
Love

Gladiator

In all reality My love is distant
It wraps around your world without a problem
It embelishes your mind with enchanted memories
The waves from the Dead Sea is taken from its melodic flow
Killer whales swim in circles describing the motion
Angry circus elephants lash back
I would be scared as well, to even think of such bliss
Every human desires true happiness
But My love might overwhelm you
It is true
Walking through the brave desserts, My love conquered wit
Swimming through the Nile, it accepted its truth
Leaping from the Everest, is sewed in stability
Loving those who hated it, My love recycled honor
As each speck of sand fell through the tight hole
it was preparing for the takeover
Though My love's holder was worried that the dogs would never come home
It kept its aim
It is true
My love has built it's hardness to an eleven on Moh's scale
But it's gentle as a pearl
All this time the holder asked if they were ready for the blessing
My love never responded
But the answer was soon revealed with a question
Are you ready for My love?
It is true

Heartbreak Hotel

The muttering silence and whispering walls talked about me while the full moon's glare sneaked in my window
crawling the the creeks of the floor
My heart's chambers collapsed
the footsteps got closer...
I've never experienced such vivid pain
Thoughts in my mind played obsolete
My throat was dry
Hands were dirty
The creaking doors slowly opened
My windows were nailed shut
Each nail hammered in with the tool of my damnation
Wimpering like I was 5 and it was my frist horror film
A silent scream awakened my senses
first hit across my face
second hit, I hit the marble floor
these eyes bled tears at the memories that slowly caressed my veins
my life was depleted
I managed to kick over the only source of protection
my candle brewed angry flames
all these prized possesions were going to become yesterday's tomorrow
I ran until my feet developed blisters
Completely out of breath
But every step I took led me one step back
...so long heartbreak hotel...
Never again shall I me charmed by your wicked smile
Not again will you taste the sweet nectar from my lips
....heartbreak hotel may have many victims trapped...
But my soul and spirit is way too grand for that
Never again heartbreak hotel

E I G H T E E N

As I embrace the healing moonlight
my mind consumed on why I was being consumed and devoured my dissimilarity
only 6 years living in what I knew was hell
I knew that I could heal the worldwhy was the world being chained down by champagne and caviar?
why does it make you feel superior?
A class of tenI was asked "what is your one wish?"
My answer?
" To make the world feel how I feel"
the 10 expected me to pour out sorrow and misunderstaning behavior
Far from my truth
I admired the winds swift lashes on my body
I melted to feel the sun's sensation caress my skin
Appreciated my mother's yells
Respected my father's decision of abandoning memeditated to the song the trees whispered
laughed at the bee's sting
experienced atroprojection
visited my deceased grandmother in her dreams
" I love you so much!" I yelled as I left her dream
My grandmother being carefully lowered 6 feetprior eighteen years of me traveling through the portal of life
I wanted to be saved!
I wanted to feel what the rest felt"SAVE ME!
"From what?
I didnt live in the Hamptons
I was blessed with unconditional love
I didn't have a family dinner every Sunday
I knew how to talk to God
I didn't recall what my salvation was for
I lived a great lifeone day walking with my mother to my school
I pretended to faintwoke up kicking and screaming
" Grandma I coming with you!, I promise I won't make the tea too hot this time! Just please come take me!"
My mum stared at me with a blank face
".. I always made her tea too hot.." she said
from then on I was casted seas away to South America
In hopes of me recieveing the blessing
I was lowered into a well by three priests
My mother calling the church continuously
"Is my baby ok? He's not crazy you know, he just needs God in his life, his plane departs tomorrow at six and I will see him at twelve."
"We know, I'll call as soon as we are done and we will take him to the airport ourselves. "
Well grandma I'm finally here with you hope I didn't keep you waiting too long
I played with the winds boomerangI joked with the sun''s heat waves
I understood why my father abandoned me
But I could'nt process why my mum cried everyday
I just want to be like the rest

T I T A N I U M

I died today
But the Tigerʼs eye gave me back my breath
I forgave that last drop of love that aided me in survival
I resented that smile that abounding me with artificial hope
My promised future was now but a mere design
This bird has flown...
I never realized how massive these wings were
How piercing and mesmerizing this heart beat sang
How sharp these claws gleamed
This heart still dripped on the white satin sheets we declared love on
Tainted with passion
I inhaled those sheets to absorb our glorious chemistry
Yet these elements fashioned Pyrite
I will always be wineAnd you will always be E&J
I may have died todayBut a phoenix by no means looks back
I suit richer in Father timeʼs glass
While you become tart in each sip
This bird has flown