Jay-Z and Beyonce were spotted having dinner at Nello's over the weekend while being hounded by the paps. Devouring what seemed to be a delicious dinner ( Seeming how B was basically swallowing and not chewing), B whispered in Jay's ear while he sipped on his wine. Looking at the photos from that evening I asked myself a question that seems to puzzle me everytime, "Why aren't relationships lasting now a days?" During her recent magazing interview B had quite an insight on how to make a relationship truly last:"I think its natural for people to sacrifice themselves in a relationship, but when you do that too much, you lose yourself. Before you know it, you don’t even know what you like anymore. You have to remember that you can depend on yourself, and go with your instincts. You don’t have to lose everything just to please the other person because its just as important that your happy. But sometimes we get so into pleasing the person we don’t think, "are we really happy?"
B has proved my point. This is why I believe it’s extremely important as a person to take time being single and finding out who you are as an individual and work on your own goals before getting involved wrapped up into someone elses. I’ve seen too many of my friends put so much emphasis and effort into making a relationship work until they lose sight of their dreams and lose everything in the process (goals, career, ambitions, friends etc) That is too much to risk for a relationship not to work and that is why I'm working on me first before I'm able to embrace another person into my life. Why try to welcome someone into your life if you don't have your sh*t together? Add on to my success and love, don't be a burden. I know people think its cute when both partners go through the struggle together but be realistic! You can avoid that struggle by just getting your life together before-hand. Love is a beautiful thing but please dont let your life revolve around it.
When I say "Love is a marketing ploy", I mean that in the most sincere way possible. When we look at 'love' back in the early 50s for example, people got married because they had to. It was a tradition to get married at a young age, have children, and comsume your life in domestic activities. If there wasn't any love in the relationship, a partner cheated, or if love was leaving the equation, people sucked it up and pushed on. Is that what love is? Tolerating and suffering? Now a days when we fall in love, we either get bored or one of the partners cheat. I look at love like diamonds. Da beers has made such a great amount of cash over marketing these diamond with slogans like "A diamond is forever" along with these heart-felt commercials. Da beers also claimed that the engagement ring is put on the ring finger because it has a vein that is connected to the heart. Now with technology and advanced science, we know better. Hollywood has projected this fairytale 'love' image to suck in viewers and drain your pockets. Apparently we are still under their spell. We mourn and wander this planet looking for our soulmate in depression while we can be living out lives. Love is controlling our life style and we don't care to change our pathetic pattern. Many readers may claim opinions that I'm some bitter and lonely person who tries to down play those who are in love. This is not the truth. I have plenty of options for being 'in-love' but I love me more. I'm able to see through Cupid's bow and arrow tactics. I know that before I even consider a relationship I must be accomplished in every aspect my heart desires. For many of those who know and believe the truth, more power to you! And for those who are embarking into the journey of love, good luck!
"People are in love with the idea of love, not the person." - Beau Averee
5 comments:
Not only did you speak about people losing there self in love, you reminded me of my self, then you happen to take me to a whole other level of your insight on love. I did lose my self in love at one point & I realized that I was in love with the idea of him. So far he was the only one I was able to actually to commit to, I'm not a fan of marriage, But I did think about it because I got more than what I expected. I kept it simple & sweet, but the ending was a tragic mess. Actually I don't really know the ending because we never actually talked about it & I guess at the time I didn't want to . . all I remember was that I was mad and that I hated the feeling of heartache and my stomach twisting and turning & I guess I was hoping that it was just "another one of those fights" where as things would blow over and we'll be alright. But it didn't. Things changed & it just happened. Change comes if you like it or not, nothing stays the same. As you said, you have to love your self and put your goals first before you pick up someone else, because if you can't balance it . . . it' not worth the risk or lost. It isn't the most awful thing being single, but it's the most sexist feeling when you have your shit together and you know that your more than okay when you have something going good for you. After all there are 6 Billion people on the face of this planet, Digg in aye? ;) My next stop is Ireland, Care to join?
-Sam
This was so insightful. Thank you for yet another thought provoking post.
Even though these last couple of months have been quite a rush for us, I'm glad you are able to keep pushing foward. You are such a strong, intelligent, talented, and of course beautiful person. This post helped me refresh my memory to who you are. You are independent. The quote at the bottom is absolutely correct.
Always in my heart, M
This speak honesty on so many levels. I admire your ambitions and how you let nothing distract you from being the phenomenal you. This is the best view I have seen in a very long time. Wake up people!
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